I Just Thought I Was There to Shop!

I once read a quote by Rick Warren that said, "the most dangerous prayer that you can pray is GOD USE ME!"  I have to say, I agree with him!  Through my journey, that has been my cry to the Lord...use my struggles and my pain to glorify the Lord for His purposes.  And you know, He most certainly has...doors have been opened for me to share what God has done in my life and speak about His grace and mercy over and over.  Sometimes, this happens in a conventional way but at other times, the circumstances are random and very unusual.  This weekend, I had one of those unusual, "chance" event type of experiences.

I was in Dallas running errands with some friends.  I was in a store (that I wasn't even supposed to go in by the way...again, a random turn of events) and I had been helped but was waiting for the employee to get back to me.  I was leaned up against a counter and a lady started commenting on how much she liked my purse, then my boots and then my jewelery...and from that, we struck up a conversation.  I have a very nice, expensive purse and I joked to her that it was my "divorce present" to myself.  Which then caused her to blurt out, "Are you happy?"  And I answered back, "Yes, happier than I've ever been, but it has nothing to do with me or a divorce, but everything to do with God and what He has done in my life.  I can take no credit for that happiness".  No sooner than the words had left my mouth, big ol' tears started pouring down her face and I KNEW...this was God ordained and I was about to learn why I was really in this store.  She proceeded to tell me that she couldn't even talk to her friends and tell them what she was telling me and no idea why she was telling me this but...she opened her heart and shared with me all about her marriage struggles and of course, by no coincidence, I had walked a very similar path and could relate with her hurts and disappointments and very real fears. 

As I told her of God's redemptive work in my life through a situation that was similar and out of my control, she began to question me, not in a defensive way but in a searching way.  She brought up these three points:

• I'm afraid of God and I don't think He likes me very much.
• I know a lot of people who go to church and they are NOT nice people.
• I don't understand why God allows bad things to happen to good people.

Wow...that could be three different sermons right there!  I proceeded to witness to her and show her that she had the very wrong impression of God and that He loves us so much BUT we do live in a fallen world, so yes, bad things can happen to good people.  I gave her a lot of encouragement in her struggles and I hope I gave her a hope infusion after sharing my journey.  It then became her turn at the counter, so we hugged and I wished her luck...and I didn't see her again.  We never even traded names.

As I turned around, my friend was standing there with her mouth wide open wondering what the heck just happened.  It was one of those surreal, God moments that you just can't make up.  I even had to ask, "Did that just happen???"  Yep, it did.

I've thought about that situation since and I realize over and over that nothing in this world is by chance.  God placed me in her path for a very specific reason.  I planted a seed and I will most likely never know what happens next.  I prayed for her later that night for God to start to stir in her heart so she would come to find Him in her time of need.  The funny thing is I had some tough things I had to do that day that I had been dreading, and I had prayed that morning for God to work it all out and for the day to be a success.  I had confidence He was going to work out all the details, which He did...but I just didn't know that wouldn't be the best thing to happen to me during the day!

Every day, we have chances to speak to people and share our stories in just regular places, but we have to be open and looking for those moments.  God wants to use ordinary people like me to carry His extraordinary message.  It's the greatest pay it forward system in the world!  Every single one of us has a story to tell but we must be open and honest and always looking for those divine opportunities.  They are there, but often times we are just too busy to stop and give someone the time of the day, much less strike up a conversation with them.  I could have easily said, "Thanks for the compliment", and turned my back on a complete stranger...so glad I didn't.  Because in the end, I was blessed too and my faith was strengthened because I felt honored that God used me in that moment.  He's watching and He's listening and He's answering my prayers.  How cool is that?!

I knew there was a reason I bought that purse!!!

JOY

Breakthroughs on a Caffeine Withdrawal

Recently, I went on an 21 day Daniel fast for a few reasons.  One, I wanted to clear my mind and draw nearer to the Lord and seek some direction for issues in my life but two, I knew I needed to detoxify my body and be healthier.  I wasn't as legalistic as an all out Daniel fast, which is basically a vegan diet, but during this period, I did give up meat, any sweets, caffeine (coffee, I really missed you!), fast foods, and alcohol, so for me, that's pretty restrictive.  I wasn't perfect and I slipped a couple of times but all in all, I was on board.  In the process of this fast, I was sick...to the point I just had no energy and was in bed or on the couch much of the time.  I mean I was coming home and sleeping during my lunch break, because I was that zapped (so if you were a client that came in that week, excuse the bed head I must have been rockin' in the afternoons!)  And on top of that, the weather was horribly cold at the same time.  Do you know how hard it was to NOT have coffee, hot tea or hot chocolate when it is 20 degrees outside and you are coughing up a lung?  Agony!

I know...I'm whining...!  You can probably guess that my focus wasn't where it should have been by the way I'm moaning above.  But there is a point to all of this, I promise!

I was discussing this fast with a friend and saying, "you know I haven't gotten as much out of it as I have when I've done an all out three day fast in the past".  But in saying that, I had to think, had I really been as submitted and all in as I have before and really seeking God?  The answer, sadly, would have to be no.  I couldn't really expect to be hearing the voice of God when I'm laying on the couch watching movies, now could I?  So, I was more than a little disappointed with myself but I thought, I'm going to finish strong.  All is not lost!  I then began to read a devotion regarding the fast and the message got my attention.  I'm going to post some here for you to read:

Food is a source of comfort for many.  Pray that the God of compassion and all comfort will become your primary source of comfort. Ask Him to use this experience with suffering to remove anything in your life that has taken the Holy Spirit's place as your Comforter.

That smacked me right between the eyes!  I've always known that I'm a stress eater and like comfort foods, as many do, BUT when you put it in that light, it made me take a step back.  Why on earth would I try to replace the comfort of the Holy Spirit with food or anything else for that matter?  That's absurb...but I see through this fast that's exactly what I've been doing at times.  And to expand on that with an even broader stroke, how many times do we do anything BUT allow the Holy Spirit to comfort us?  We work harder, longer hours, drink or smoke, some even do drugs, while others party, some have computer/TV addictions...basically anything but sitting still and allowing that peace that passes all understanding to wash over us.

Even Jesus relied on the Holy Spirit while tempted here on earth:

Luke 4:1-2
Jesus, full of the Holy Spirit, left the Jordan and was led by the Spirit into the wilderness, where for forty days he was tempted by the devil. He ate nothing during those days, and at the end of them he was hungry.

By following Jesus' lead (which by the way is always a good thing to do!), we see He had to rely on the Holy Spirit to get him through a VERY trying time (40 days without food?  Be still my heart!) of physical and spiritual temptation.  There's the example to follow.

Breakthrough!!!  Guess clearing my brain of all that coffee did shake something loose finally.  It may seem like a very basic thing but for me, it was a big eye opener.  Once again, I'm doing the job and trying to run the show, but instead I should be allowing the Holy Spirit that control.  Instead of self medicating with food or drink, I need to rely on the Great Comforter.  If I'm tired, I don't need a jolt of caffeine...I need an infusion of the Holy Spirit!  Why should I rely on me, myself and I, when I've got someone far greater to lean upon?  It sounds so simplistic I know...but denying the flesh and walking in the Spirit can be really tough.  Of course, the enemy is all too good to lead us in to some sort of temptation to numb ourselves and prevent us from turning to the Lord and tapping in to a real source of strength, power, and comfort that will last and not be fleeting.  We walk around so many times just as zombies, never realizing what we are doing to our bodies, and even more specifically, WHY we are doing it in the first place.

Once again, even though my heart wasn't in the perfect place and I hadn't been perfect in my carrying out of the original plan, I'm so glad that God still used the experience to show me something very important and personal...even though it wasn't what I expected!  That's grace people.

And by the way, who wants to buy me a steak?!  :)

JOY

Basketball and Life...How You Win

If you know me, you know I am an avid basketball fan.  And, to add to that I'm a huge Dallas Mavericks basketball fan so I go to a lot of games and follow them closely.  They've had a great start this season and have played so well that people had already started the whispers about "championship"...until last week.  Last week, their star MVP forward, Dirk Nowitzki, went out of the game with what turned out to be a knee strain.  He hasn't suited up since and he has been relegated to cheering the team on from the sidelines (and last night throwing out Tshirts!).  And to add insult to injury, in the same week, they lost another star forward, Caron Butler, for the season due to a patellar tendon rupture that required surgery.  There were also a few other players that missed a game here or there due to minor injuries.  They even had to pull a player up out of the D League to suit up and play because they were that short on players.  So all in all, a rough week for the ol' Mavs.  They lost three games in a row that they should have won when they had only lost five games the ENTIRE season.  I mean, that is a blow to your pride and ego whether you are a player, coach, owner or a fan.  I'm sure that locker room was not a fun place to be after those games.  Naysayers started saying that Dallas can't win without Dirk.  But you know what happened?  After a few losses, and I'm sure a lot of intense practices, the guys started to gel again and become a new team and hit a new stride.  They've won the last two in a row and that's a huge boost to their morale. 

Why do I write all of this?  It's because I started thinking about basketball and how it relates to life and I've been drawing some parallels.  That team could've easily said, "It's over, they are right...we can't win without Dirk or Caron".  But instead, they regrouped, they didn't listen to the negative speak and they came out with a Can-Do attitude...even after some tough back-to-back losses.  What doesn't beat you makes you stronger, right?!  That's what being a team is all about and that's how champions are made...it's not one guy (although one really awesome guy helps!) that wins it, but it is a whole team.  Championships aren't handed over but they are earned and many times won through some adversity along the way that caused real growth for the team.  It's about positive attitude, picking yourself up when the chips are down, and turning a deaf ear to the negative attitude of the world.  It's about flat refusing to be beat. It's about heart.  It's about believing you can win.  I predict that at the end of the season, they will look back and say not having Dirk in these few games was the best thing that could've happened to this team.  Other guys have stepped up and done an outstanding job.  When Dirk is back, that's just going to mean a much stronger team across the board.

Isn't that how life works when you think about it?  We all go through tough times but it is very interesting how people handle perhaps the very same situation.  Person #1 takes it all in stride and makes a bad situation a defining moment for them and a real touchstone in their life.  They can look back and see that situation is what it took to make them who they are and they are better for it.  Person #2, gives up, becomes negative and bitter and just loses hope and let's face it....never recover and they become a miserable person.  They listen to those naysayers and they believe the negative and therefore it becomes true.  What's the difference in the two?  Because in this life, we are never promised an easy ride (and if you've bought that lie, you might want to ask for a return!)...in fact, quite the opposite. It all comes down to attitude, mental toughness and thinking Christ-like thoughts that I believe makes the difference.  I believe your attitude can make you or break you as a person.  I believe through hardships and trials, no matter how tough they are, that if you keep your identity in Christ and keep that positive attitude and don't give up, that you can and will grow through adversity.  It's not easy and it's not fun and there will be some really tough, uphill days...but when you get to top of that mountain, how much sweeter the victory will be!

So with a New Year comes new attitudes and I want to encourage everyone to maybe make an attitude adjustment right now!  Fill your mind with positive thoughts and beliefs and surround yourselves with those that do the same.  Don't listen to the lies of the world but keep your thoughts Christ-centered.  I believe...no I KNOW...it makes all the difference.  Do you want to be Person #1 or Person #2?  The choice is yours.

Attitude Is Everything!

JOY

PS GO MAVS!

'Tis the Season

I can't believe I haven't written a post in two weeks!  That just shows that I, like the rest of the world, have been extremely busy just due to the time of the year.  It is so easy to get overbooked during the holidays without even trying.  The first two weeks of this month were craziness for me with vacationing in New York right after getting back from Thanksgiving break.  I think I met myself coming and going!

I've been doing a 25 day Christmas study/devotion this month and I have really enjoyed digging into the Word and learning more in depth about the promises and back story to the birth of Christ.  As a Christian, this time of the year is so special because it is a time to remember the birth of our Savior.  It truly is the reason for and behind the season and to me, it is heart breaking that many people miss that important fact.  Don't get me wrong, I love every part of Christmas from santa, to frosty, to gifts, to decorating the tree, to cooking and more importantly eating, to looking at Christmas lights and singing carols and of course most importantly, being with family...but to me, that's just the fluff and icing of Christmas.  The real substance of the holiday is the birth of Christ.

This time of the year is just a pressure cooker of a season and more people are depressed and lonely during the holidays than any other time of the year.  It is so easy to focus on what you don't have, how little money you have, what gifts you didn't get, how you wish your Christmas lights were better than your neighbors...whatever...but don't let the world steal the joy of the season!  Last year, I was given the most precious of gifts in the most unfashionable way that completely transformed Christmas to me forever more and I would like to share a little of that story here today. 

Due to having a spouse walk out of my life right before Thanksgiving last year, it meant that I had to make it through the holiday trifecta of Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years alone.  For a person who was already depressed and whose world had just fallen apart, that is about as low of a blow as you can receive!  Add to that I found out he had filed for divorce and I got served papers TWICE the week before the holiday and I was pretty darn low as one can imagine.  Due to how we had already arranged our "holiday schedule" months before with families, it mean that I would actually spend Christmas day at home, now alone, after celebrating with my family the week before Christmas.  Now, don't go feeling too sorry for me as I had PLENTY of friends and family inviting me to do things with them and most offers, I politely declined because let's face it, I was pretty much a party destroyer with my emotional state of mind and I was okay with my Christmas being depressing, but I didn't want to ruin anyone elses.  I went to church on Christmas Eve after spending some time with a dear friend's family that took me in...and then the snow began to set in (in fact I barely made it home as the roads were so bad that night).  It was actually the beginnings of a White Christmas, which was beautiful and wonderful and NEVER happens in Texas, but it also meant that any plans I had for Christmas day were now squaushed because the roads were pretty treacherous in our area.  I was isolated.  I got home Christmas Eve night and I did what I did best at that point in my life...I sat there and I cried and I prayed...a lot.  Alone with my thoughts.  Quiet.  I thought about all the people surrounded by their families, their husbands, their loved ones at that moment and I took a long hard look around me and in that moment...I was ashamed and I felt like a failure.  You see, everything I had worked so hard for as in a career, a business, a marriage, and "stuff" that had been acquired (emphasis on I)...didn't really mean much in that moment.  Let's just say I needed a priority shift in my life.  I know now that God isolated me in that season of my life for a reason...to teach me some valuable lessons...and I don't mean that in a vengeful, punishing way...I mean that in a loving, caring, fatherly way. 

The next morning, I woke up to a beautiful white Christmas.  I was determined to make the most of the day and not be depressed as I had been the night before.  There is nothing like a snow covered morning to make you realize that every day is a do-over and the slate has been wiped clean.  That was a gift and I knew it was just for me.  I then sat with my coffee and opened my Bible and I read the Christmas story and the words leapt off the page.  Although I had read and heard the story umpteen times, it was like this time was the very first time.  I meditated on the fact that God would bring such a gift to the world, His very own son, knowing the end result...as in 33 years later, Jesus would die a horrible death on a cross that He most certainly did not deserve and that His last words would be "My God, My God, why have you forsaken me".  What a gift, what a sacrifice and what a plan for our salvation.  I began to just get a glimpse of the love that God had for me, for each of us, to give that kind of a gift to the world in order to save our eternity and to cover over our sins, our failures, and our missteps.  The birth of Christ is a gift that not a one of us deserved, but because of our Father's love for us, He set His plan into motion.  It is about second chances, hope, and love DESPITE our failures.  There is nothing I could do to deserve that valuable of a gift, but in that moment of reflection, I "got it" and I began to see there would be a light at the end of the tunnel for me, there was something to hope for and there was most certainly a master plan in motion.  Not to say the next year wasn't without its ups and downs but in that moment, I received the gift of hope and love.  In short, after all these years, I was able to process on a deeper level what Christmas truly meant to me.  That revelation was a gift and a precious time that I will never forget and it has become a defining moment in my life.  Again, what the enemy meant to harm me, depress me and to be my undoing...God used for His purposes as He began to show me He was in control of my life and that ultimately brought me peace and joy.

So, this Christmas, be sure and take the time to think about what this season means and don't get lost in the stress and the hustle and the bustle that the world brings with this season.  Take the time to reflect, to meditate, to be humbled on the price that gift ultimately cost and I guarantee you the rest of the "stresses" of the holiday will fade away, and you, too, will celebrate Christmas with a grateful and humble heart.

He is the Reason!

Joy