I was at the Desperate for Jesus conference in Dallas this weekend with a friend, listening to a message by Beth Moore (who rocks by the way!!!), that turned out to be avery prophetic message for what she was about to go through that very weekend (Topic: Bruised, not Broken; Surviving the Storms of this Life). The details are hers, and not mine to share, but I wanted to touch on some things that just rocked my world due to the way the events unfolded.
First off, I don't know why I'm still bowled over by the providential nature of our God...but I am. I think I said before, I no longer believe in coincidences and I don't, for reals! I see that everything that happens, happens for a reason and God is in control, even if it is something bad...He isn't suprised and many times probably allows it to happen because He's going to use it for His good in the future (that's a whole 'nuther topic though). With all that being said, I want to say that we were in the EXACT place God wanted us to be this weekend when she was delivered some devastating, soul crushing, news. Talk about a storm...I would call this one a tsunami and I ain't jokin' folks. Literally, Beth Moore had just walked off the stage and finished her talk when the phone rang and my friend received this crushing news. Immediately, she was surrounded by prayer warriors at Oak Cliff. And let me tell you, this women could pray down fire from heaven. I mean, when they spoke, I can tell you, God was on it and probably even said YES M'AAM!!! Powerful stuff...I'm just glad we are on the same team! They rallied around us, supported my friend, even got a shuttle to take us directly to our car (and it was a LOOOONG way away so praise God for that)...and while we waited for the shuttle, another lady came and prayed over us and my friend went from hysterics....to peace...all in that one time of prayer. It was amazing to watch, feel and know that God was there and comforting her (and me too...I was in shock along with her even though this wasn't happening to me). I was able to drive her home, as I had driven us there, and get her where she needed to be to take care of things. I even called the gentleman who had broken the news to her to get more details...and he said to me "I have wrestled with calling her all day but I just felt I should and broke down and did it" Mind you this event had occurred about 12 hours earlier...God held him off until literally the PERFECT time...crazy stuff ya'll!
After the crisis mode had died down I was able to think...what if...? What if she'd been with her children and gotten that news? What if she hadn't looked down and saw her phone, that was on silent, ringing and answered it right then? What if we had been ANYWHERE else...how alone and lost would she have felt? What if that guy had called her earlier in the day, before we heard Beth Moore finish her message and wrap up and get the exact message she was going to need just seconds later? But you know what...we don't serve a what if God! He's on time, every time...right on time to be quite honest. Perfect, never late, never slow to keep His promises. He knew way before time this was all going to happen, and He had her and I sign up for that conference together because He knew how bad we were going to need it!
And in the words of Beth Moore, "You may see the ship broken to pieces in the storm, but you WILL NOT BE BROKEN...but you might get bruised! Wherever our ship runs aground is the EXACT place God has sent us and we will emerge a victor. He will bring a force that the hurricane will have to bow down to!" And my very favorite quote and one I want to shout from the roof tops as I've lived it and can testify to its truth "On the other side of a perfect storm, the serpent is all bite and NO VENOM!!! After all that intimidation and despair by the enemy, we realize the enemy has no power compared to our God." Preach it sista!!! Can I get a witness on that one?!
What happened to my friend and loved one this weekend was a spiritual attack plain and simple. It was evil, it was desperate, it was dark, it was horrible and life destroying and life taking for one person. But, what the enemy wants to use for destruction and despair, God is going to refine and use for His good and His glory in His perfect timing...you just watch and see!
Proverbs 30:4 (New International Version)
Who has gone up to heaven and come down?
Who has gathered up the wind in the hollow of his hands?
Who has wrapped up the waters in his cloak?
Who has established all the ends of the earth?
What is his name, and the name of his son?
Tell me if you know!
Thank you God for being our refuge and safe haven in times of trouble!
JOY
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Monday, July 26, 2010
Gettin' Back to My Roots
A few weeks back, I went for a visit to my hometown in East Texas to see my family, as well as my sister who was up for the week with the twins. I had a lot of driving time down there and back and I just really had a lot of time to my thoughts, no radio, no phone, just thinking. I really was reflecting back on the past 9 months and how one of the lessons I feel God has tried to enforce to me is to "simplify". I got that message loud and clear after Haiti for sure and realized I just have too much stuff that I don't need, and I'm involved in too many things that aren't life giving to others. So, when I came back, down the hammer came on a lot of areas of my life.
My life can be crazy and pretty "noisy" just due to the nature of what I do, but that doesn't mean that everything I'm involved in has to be noisy, too! I've prayed specifically on which direction God wants me to take on several issues and I actually got some answers on that trip and really felt a peace about it. Amazing what some driving time can do for a girl! And when I got back, some things I had kinda been thinking about like "hmm, well, I wonder how that would work" but really, I hadn't even thought to pray about yet...well, they got answered out of the blue. So I got answered prayers that hadn't even been prayed yet...now that is way cool!
I was laughing to myself the other day as I heard for about the jillionith time, "can't believe you let your beamer go!". Not, wow, I'm sorry you got divorced but, you didn't get to keep the car??? And people are shocked when I said that was my choice...sure I could've kept it but I had other priorities. It's a sad state of our world when people are more worried about what happens to a car! A good friend even asked me if I was going to cry when I gave it back and I just had to laugh...I've had bigger fish to fry in my life to have time to worry about the fate of a car. I didn't shed a tear...it's just a material thing and I've learned that they don't bring happiness. Maybe one day I will own a BMW again, maybe I won't. Honestly, I'm not losing sleep over it. It was fun to drive...but you know my dually gets me from point A to point B just fine!
I've spent the last ten years of my life trying to measure up and prove who I am to myself, to others and claw my way to the top...and I forgot at some point that I only need to check in with an audience of one. I realized on that trip to East Texas that I've grown and matured and developed as an adult and that's all well and good, but there's also nothing wrong with my roots either. I can embrace them both and merge them into one, and honestly, that helped me decide about some big future plans that I'm putting into action...and am quite excited about! So, God used my roots and "where I come from" to speak some pretty cool stuff over me that I'm sure I will be sharing in the near future...
I think other than simplifying my life, the other thing I've learned is to be content, right where I'm at, right now. I don't really worry about tomorrow, or next week, I'm just happy with the day I have in front of me right now. And, I'm content with what I do and what all I have in my life because it's enough, actually more than enough if I'm honest. God used the trials I have been through to sift me like wheat, remove impurities, get the junk out that needed to be purged...and then what is left is much more useable for His goals and purposes. And, I'm good with that...I see it needed to happen and I'm glad that when I had a choice to make, I chose Him. When it all boils down, life actually is pretty simple...we make it hard. I'm chosing to simplify, be content with my life and just .... be still and enjoy it.
Philippians 4:11
I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.
Content Right Where I'm At,
JOY
My life can be crazy and pretty "noisy" just due to the nature of what I do, but that doesn't mean that everything I'm involved in has to be noisy, too! I've prayed specifically on which direction God wants me to take on several issues and I actually got some answers on that trip and really felt a peace about it. Amazing what some driving time can do for a girl! And when I got back, some things I had kinda been thinking about like "hmm, well, I wonder how that would work" but really, I hadn't even thought to pray about yet...well, they got answered out of the blue. So I got answered prayers that hadn't even been prayed yet...now that is way cool!
I was laughing to myself the other day as I heard for about the jillionith time, "can't believe you let your beamer go!". Not, wow, I'm sorry you got divorced but, you didn't get to keep the car??? And people are shocked when I said that was my choice...sure I could've kept it but I had other priorities. It's a sad state of our world when people are more worried about what happens to a car! A good friend even asked me if I was going to cry when I gave it back and I just had to laugh...I've had bigger fish to fry in my life to have time to worry about the fate of a car. I didn't shed a tear...it's just a material thing and I've learned that they don't bring happiness. Maybe one day I will own a BMW again, maybe I won't. Honestly, I'm not losing sleep over it. It was fun to drive...but you know my dually gets me from point A to point B just fine!
I've spent the last ten years of my life trying to measure up and prove who I am to myself, to others and claw my way to the top...and I forgot at some point that I only need to check in with an audience of one. I realized on that trip to East Texas that I've grown and matured and developed as an adult and that's all well and good, but there's also nothing wrong with my roots either. I can embrace them both and merge them into one, and honestly, that helped me decide about some big future plans that I'm putting into action...and am quite excited about! So, God used my roots and "where I come from" to speak some pretty cool stuff over me that I'm sure I will be sharing in the near future...
I think other than simplifying my life, the other thing I've learned is to be content, right where I'm at, right now. I don't really worry about tomorrow, or next week, I'm just happy with the day I have in front of me right now. And, I'm content with what I do and what all I have in my life because it's enough, actually more than enough if I'm honest. God used the trials I have been through to sift me like wheat, remove impurities, get the junk out that needed to be purged...and then what is left is much more useable for His goals and purposes. And, I'm good with that...I see it needed to happen and I'm glad that when I had a choice to make, I chose Him. When it all boils down, life actually is pretty simple...we make it hard. I'm chosing to simplify, be content with my life and just .... be still and enjoy it.
Philippians 4:11
I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.
Content Right Where I'm At,
JOY
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Grass vs Astroturf
A few weeks ago, Pastor Rick Warren tweeted the following:
"The grass is not greener on the other side, it has just been watered! And if it really is greener, it just might be astroturf."
I wish I was smart enough to come up with such a catchy phrase, but instead, I just steal them from others! I've thought a lot about that phrase off and on and how it relates to just about any relationship.
Last night, I was walking home after taking my dog for a long walk, and I was able to really look at my yard as I walked up the driveway. After all this glorious rain and being freshly mowed yesterday, it is just green and lush and beautiful. For those that don't know, that in itself has been a labor of love. We have a HUGE front yard and it just had some ugly native grasses. So, last year, we decide to spend the money and get it hydromulched and get some nice saint augustine grass growing. Well...we did this about June when it was SUPER hot and of course zero rain for the rest of the summer...and we learned AFTER THE FACT that we have about zero water pressure to water even a small area. So, more money, more labor ensued to get more water pressure and for WEEKS, we were watering our investment like mad, moving sprinklers constantly and trying to keep that grass from dying. It even got to a point where we said forget about the grass farthest from the road, let's just water this nearest to the house and try to save it. It appeared, at that time, an exercise in futility...to a point that we just felt defeated and up against Mother Nature. We even had people tell us that was a waste of money, they could have "told us that wouldn't work", etc. So, talk about add insult to injury.
Well, I'm here to tell you that not only this year is the grass alive, it is beautiful. Sure, there are some weeds that have to be addressed, but really with all the God sent rain, it is lush, green, inviting and just downright pretty. And you know what else? It has SPREAD...even the areas we gave up on and said "it's a lost cause":...well now they are green, too! I hadn't really focused on it that much till last night...and I just laughed and thought, "what a difference a year makes".
Now back to that comment above...aren't relationships just like my yard if you think about it? Sometimes, they just look like no matter what the effort, they are going to die...it's futile, hopeless, just move on. And people are all too quick to affirm that. People often just move on to another person...but if you use my analogy with the yard, would you give up watering your grass and start watering your neighbors? Ummm, I don't think so! You would dig in and bear down and do the best you can with your own yard! So, why do we give up on relationships so easy? And I'm not just talking about a spouse...I'm talking about family, friends, co-workers...the list goes on.
The work that is put into a relationship is hard work...and when we are wrapped up in it, it can look pretty hopeless. But, if we just dig in, commit to doing the work, don't listen to the advice of the "world" but walk in the spirit...one day, maybe a year down the road we realize that at some point, our love started to be re-infused, it started to spread, and it started to grow. Maybe we can't put our finger on the exact date but we see the results in the relationship and what a beautful thing to watch it blossom and grow. Sure, we have to keep up the work and keep the weeds out, as you can never stop working on a relationship, but the cycle gets easier if the work is done up front and those seeds planted will reap a mighty harvest one day in the near future.
Isaiah 55:9-11
"As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.
As the rain and the snow come down from heaven, and do not return to it without watering the earth and making it bud and flourish, so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater, so is my word that goes out from my mouth.
It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it."
In Him,
JOY
"The grass is not greener on the other side, it has just been watered! And if it really is greener, it just might be astroturf."
I wish I was smart enough to come up with such a catchy phrase, but instead, I just steal them from others! I've thought a lot about that phrase off and on and how it relates to just about any relationship.
Last night, I was walking home after taking my dog for a long walk, and I was able to really look at my yard as I walked up the driveway. After all this glorious rain and being freshly mowed yesterday, it is just green and lush and beautiful. For those that don't know, that in itself has been a labor of love. We have a HUGE front yard and it just had some ugly native grasses. So, last year, we decide to spend the money and get it hydromulched and get some nice saint augustine grass growing. Well...we did this about June when it was SUPER hot and of course zero rain for the rest of the summer...and we learned AFTER THE FACT that we have about zero water pressure to water even a small area. So, more money, more labor ensued to get more water pressure and for WEEKS, we were watering our investment like mad, moving sprinklers constantly and trying to keep that grass from dying. It even got to a point where we said forget about the grass farthest from the road, let's just water this nearest to the house and try to save it. It appeared, at that time, an exercise in futility...to a point that we just felt defeated and up against Mother Nature. We even had people tell us that was a waste of money, they could have "told us that wouldn't work", etc. So, talk about add insult to injury.
Well, I'm here to tell you that not only this year is the grass alive, it is beautiful. Sure, there are some weeds that have to be addressed, but really with all the God sent rain, it is lush, green, inviting and just downright pretty. And you know what else? It has SPREAD...even the areas we gave up on and said "it's a lost cause":...well now they are green, too! I hadn't really focused on it that much till last night...and I just laughed and thought, "what a difference a year makes".
Now back to that comment above...aren't relationships just like my yard if you think about it? Sometimes, they just look like no matter what the effort, they are going to die...it's futile, hopeless, just move on. And people are all too quick to affirm that. People often just move on to another person...but if you use my analogy with the yard, would you give up watering your grass and start watering your neighbors? Ummm, I don't think so! You would dig in and bear down and do the best you can with your own yard! So, why do we give up on relationships so easy? And I'm not just talking about a spouse...I'm talking about family, friends, co-workers...the list goes on.
The work that is put into a relationship is hard work...and when we are wrapped up in it, it can look pretty hopeless. But, if we just dig in, commit to doing the work, don't listen to the advice of the "world" but walk in the spirit...one day, maybe a year down the road we realize that at some point, our love started to be re-infused, it started to spread, and it started to grow. Maybe we can't put our finger on the exact date but we see the results in the relationship and what a beautful thing to watch it blossom and grow. Sure, we have to keep up the work and keep the weeds out, as you can never stop working on a relationship, but the cycle gets easier if the work is done up front and those seeds planted will reap a mighty harvest one day in the near future.
Isaiah 55:9-11
"As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.
As the rain and the snow come down from heaven, and do not return to it without watering the earth and making it bud and flourish, so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater, so is my word that goes out from my mouth.
It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it."
In Him,
JOY
Monday, July 12, 2010
Got Forgiveness?
I've hinted at the fact that the flood gates have been opened wide since my ordeal and a LOT of folks confide in me about their marital problems or hurts, which is a really humbling as often I feel very unworthy, but it is a very cool thing. I have learned and am learning a lot on this journey, but talking to people with their real life struggles and experiences now and in the past has been very eye opening and a blessing to me.
Through talking with people, I would have to say the common denominator in these stories centers around forgiveness, or the lack of it. It is our human nature to get hurt and then say, "You are going to pay for that!". But, that is definitely not what God wants us to do. And when life is not going so good, who do you hurt? Those closest to you...which means most of the time our spouse. Over time, these hurts become very additive and one day, we end up carrying around so much unforgiveness in our hearts...we just can't seem to remember why we should even forgive and we feel justified in our hurt. It becomes the "how did we get here?" story.
We often joke around about "WWJD?"...and I will tell you if you read His words, you will see EXACTLY what He did over and over....He forgave people. Even if they didn't deserve it, even in the act of sinning, even if they were a rotten, no good scoundrel...He forgave. I think in any relationship, that is what we are called to do...forgive even if that person "doesn't deserve it"...especially if they don't! I've found in my life that forgiveness is a choice...it's black or white, no and's, if's or but's...you either do it or you don't. But by forgiving, you take that weight off your shoulders and you don't waste your life being weighted down by unforgiveness. How freeing that is! Does it always change the situation? Sadly, no...but it does change your heart and keep it soft and supple and in tune with God's heart for His children.
I'm reading The Ragamuffin Gospel by Brennan Manning, which by the way is AMAZING and I'm wondering why I never read it before! I've heard him speak before and he is as powerful a speaker as he is a writer. In his book, he says "If you really want to understand a man, don't just listen to what he says, but watch what he does". So how are we all doing in THAT category? Yeahhhh.....What do people see when they see our actions? I think the act of forgiveness says a whole lot about the character of a person and what their internal makeup, i.e their heart, is like. As Christians and just people in general, it is so easy to just hang on to our hurts but what kind of witness and example are we showing the world? Is it a wonder that people are turned off of religion because they are watching our walk and they see it is not lining up with our talk?!
There is one last point I want to leave you with that impacted me greatly from this same book. We think others don't deserve forgiveness because they've wronged us just way too much/too many times...but pull the camera back a bit and look at the bigger picture and think about the forgiveness and grace that has been given to us by our Holy Father. Do we deserve that?
"To be alive is to be broken. And to be broken is to stand in need of grace. Honesty keeps us in touch with our neediness and the truth that we are saved sinners."
Choosing to forgive,
JOY
Through talking with people, I would have to say the common denominator in these stories centers around forgiveness, or the lack of it. It is our human nature to get hurt and then say, "You are going to pay for that!". But, that is definitely not what God wants us to do. And when life is not going so good, who do you hurt? Those closest to you...which means most of the time our spouse. Over time, these hurts become very additive and one day, we end up carrying around so much unforgiveness in our hearts...we just can't seem to remember why we should even forgive and we feel justified in our hurt. It becomes the "how did we get here?" story.
We often joke around about "WWJD?"...and I will tell you if you read His words, you will see EXACTLY what He did over and over....He forgave people. Even if they didn't deserve it, even in the act of sinning, even if they were a rotten, no good scoundrel...He forgave. I think in any relationship, that is what we are called to do...forgive even if that person "doesn't deserve it"...especially if they don't! I've found in my life that forgiveness is a choice...it's black or white, no and's, if's or but's...you either do it or you don't. But by forgiving, you take that weight off your shoulders and you don't waste your life being weighted down by unforgiveness. How freeing that is! Does it always change the situation? Sadly, no...but it does change your heart and keep it soft and supple and in tune with God's heart for His children.
I'm reading The Ragamuffin Gospel by Brennan Manning, which by the way is AMAZING and I'm wondering why I never read it before! I've heard him speak before and he is as powerful a speaker as he is a writer. In his book, he says "If you really want to understand a man, don't just listen to what he says, but watch what he does". So how are we all doing in THAT category? Yeahhhh.....What do people see when they see our actions? I think the act of forgiveness says a whole lot about the character of a person and what their internal makeup, i.e their heart, is like. As Christians and just people in general, it is so easy to just hang on to our hurts but what kind of witness and example are we showing the world? Is it a wonder that people are turned off of religion because they are watching our walk and they see it is not lining up with our talk?!
There is one last point I want to leave you with that impacted me greatly from this same book. We think others don't deserve forgiveness because they've wronged us just way too much/too many times...but pull the camera back a bit and look at the bigger picture and think about the forgiveness and grace that has been given to us by our Holy Father. Do we deserve that?
"To be alive is to be broken. And to be broken is to stand in need of grace. Honesty keeps us in touch with our neediness and the truth that we are saved sinners."
Choosing to forgive,
JOY
Friday, July 9, 2010
We'll leave the light on...
This week, I've been ambushed by God, but in a good way. He has surrounded me with messages, speakers, His Word, and sermons that all hone in on the heart of the same subject matter. Isn't it cool how God will do that? He knows we are just flat out dumb sometimes, so He hammers home His point a few times just to make sure it sinks in!
I listed to John Henderson speak at DBC Tuesday night and his talk laid out the descent into depression and then the flip side of that dealing with the ascent into joyful abundance...complete with flow chart and verses, which is just my nerdy style! It was phenomenal and I could see myself on both sides of the page...where I've been and where I am now. He showed that pride and self rule are the two main root causes for the end point of depression and they are devastating. They lead to lust or fear, depending on what kind of person you are, and then as you continue to try to control that lust or fear, you become angry as you fail (sometimes you succeed for a bit but it doesn't last), then the lust/fear increases, you keep running through jell-o to increase the effort and try to hang on to what you believe to be true, which turns out to be a futile process and you end up in the wilderness...depressed, hopeless, regretful, isolated and full of self pity and self hate. His point was that God brings you to that wilderness because of your pride to deal with you...we honestly believe if we get "our way", life will be good. But througout this process, He is testing our heart to see if we will obey Him...and He alone understands our heart. BUT, we often don't even know our OWN heart...so He takes us out into the wilderness to humble us, expose us, teach us and for us to have to honestly deal with what comes out of our heart during that process, which often is some pretty foul and smelly stuff that we need to purge out of our life.
I'm just going to pause here to let THAT all sink in...I can tell you when he went through all of that, you could have heard a pin drop as every person in that room knew exactly what he was talking about, some better than others (yes, I mean ME!), but we've all been there.
So, now the good news...
there is a path to joyful abundance (thank God for that!), and I am here to tell you it does exist! By submitting to Christ and HIS RULE for our lives (aka walking in the spirit and not the flesh/world), we become content and at peace, and we trust in God...sometimes through comfortable circumstances, but very often it is in the middle of pain and suffering...and that grows our faith. As we grow more faith, we trust more and we learn to love/obey God more, which increases contentment, increases faith and just like Pavlov's dog experiment...we see the positive reward feedback..so we trust more, have more faith, then more obedience, and we find happiness through the Father (the only one who doesn't let us down) and we realize, it was there all along, we were just looking in all the wrong places. So simple, yet so hard to do at times because we are deceived, lost and under attack of the enemy. We all know someone who is trying to be happy by getting the bigger house, more stuff, better job, nicer car, new spouse, etc. But are those people ever happy? NO...they just keep trying to fill the void in their life with more and more things...never realizing where that emptiness is coming from.
And that brings me to my next point...prodigals. Pretty much everyone has a prodigal in their life at some time...could be a child, a friend, a spouse, a parent, etc. I just read a GREAT book that is a must read called Bringing Home the Prodigals by Rob Parsons. In it, he mentions that in Jesus' day, HE was considered a prodigal by religious authorities. Interesting point. He also says that "in love's service, only the wounded soldiers can serve." That makes me think of myself and is an adequate description...if I hadn't been through pain, I wouldn't have the clarity I am receiving now and I wouldn't be available and open to share my story with hurting people. I would have missed out on the biggest blessing of my life and potentially missed what God was calling to do. And as Craig Groeschel quotes, "the path to your greatest potential is often straight through your greatest fear". I have had some on-my-knees moments of fear through this process and I had to make some tough choices, like do I want to be here anymore on this Earth if I'm being honest. But, I decided to walk through the fear, the pain, the refining fire and say there is a reason for all of this and I'm going to hold on to God's promises and see what He has in store for me. And, I'm so glad I did...not to say every day is an easy one and I have life all figured out and wrapped up in a neat little package, but I have found that joyful abundance...and the story is still being written!
The last point I want to make is a little twist on the prodigal son story in the Bible that Parsons discusses in his book. When prodigals do come home, they are straight out of the pigsty of this world and they are filthy, but we need to be very careful to treat them as the Father in the story did...and not the elder brother. It takes a lot of courage to make that walk home...but if we leave the light on, they will find their way home eventually. Very few people stay in the pigsty of life forever...I mean, we have our fun for a time, but who wants to live there when you have a whole Kingdom awaiting you? It reminds me of the old Motel 6 commerical with Tom Bodette "We'll Leave the Light On for Ya". Sometimes in the darkness of night, the prodigals of this world need to see that little beacon of light to grab on to and find their way back home to the peace that can only be found in our God. Just remember when they show up on the door step, to be the Father, and not the brother!
I don't know about you, but my light literally and figuratively is on, every night...
JOY
I listed to John Henderson speak at DBC Tuesday night and his talk laid out the descent into depression and then the flip side of that dealing with the ascent into joyful abundance...complete with flow chart and verses, which is just my nerdy style! It was phenomenal and I could see myself on both sides of the page...where I've been and where I am now. He showed that pride and self rule are the two main root causes for the end point of depression and they are devastating. They lead to lust or fear, depending on what kind of person you are, and then as you continue to try to control that lust or fear, you become angry as you fail (sometimes you succeed for a bit but it doesn't last), then the lust/fear increases, you keep running through jell-o to increase the effort and try to hang on to what you believe to be true, which turns out to be a futile process and you end up in the wilderness...depressed, hopeless, regretful, isolated and full of self pity and self hate. His point was that God brings you to that wilderness because of your pride to deal with you...we honestly believe if we get "our way", life will be good. But througout this process, He is testing our heart to see if we will obey Him...and He alone understands our heart. BUT, we often don't even know our OWN heart...so He takes us out into the wilderness to humble us, expose us, teach us and for us to have to honestly deal with what comes out of our heart during that process, which often is some pretty foul and smelly stuff that we need to purge out of our life.
I'm just going to pause here to let THAT all sink in...I can tell you when he went through all of that, you could have heard a pin drop as every person in that room knew exactly what he was talking about, some better than others (yes, I mean ME!), but we've all been there.
So, now the good news...
there is a path to joyful abundance (thank God for that!), and I am here to tell you it does exist! By submitting to Christ and HIS RULE for our lives (aka walking in the spirit and not the flesh/world), we become content and at peace, and we trust in God...sometimes through comfortable circumstances, but very often it is in the middle of pain and suffering...and that grows our faith. As we grow more faith, we trust more and we learn to love/obey God more, which increases contentment, increases faith and just like Pavlov's dog experiment...we see the positive reward feedback..so we trust more, have more faith, then more obedience, and we find happiness through the Father (the only one who doesn't let us down) and we realize, it was there all along, we were just looking in all the wrong places. So simple, yet so hard to do at times because we are deceived, lost and under attack of the enemy. We all know someone who is trying to be happy by getting the bigger house, more stuff, better job, nicer car, new spouse, etc. But are those people ever happy? NO...they just keep trying to fill the void in their life with more and more things...never realizing where that emptiness is coming from.
And that brings me to my next point...prodigals. Pretty much everyone has a prodigal in their life at some time...could be a child, a friend, a spouse, a parent, etc. I just read a GREAT book that is a must read called Bringing Home the Prodigals by Rob Parsons. In it, he mentions that in Jesus' day, HE was considered a prodigal by religious authorities. Interesting point. He also says that "in love's service, only the wounded soldiers can serve." That makes me think of myself and is an adequate description...if I hadn't been through pain, I wouldn't have the clarity I am receiving now and I wouldn't be available and open to share my story with hurting people. I would have missed out on the biggest blessing of my life and potentially missed what God was calling to do. And as Craig Groeschel quotes, "the path to your greatest potential is often straight through your greatest fear". I have had some on-my-knees moments of fear through this process and I had to make some tough choices, like do I want to be here anymore on this Earth if I'm being honest. But, I decided to walk through the fear, the pain, the refining fire and say there is a reason for all of this and I'm going to hold on to God's promises and see what He has in store for me. And, I'm so glad I did...not to say every day is an easy one and I have life all figured out and wrapped up in a neat little package, but I have found that joyful abundance...and the story is still being written!
The last point I want to make is a little twist on the prodigal son story in the Bible that Parsons discusses in his book. When prodigals do come home, they are straight out of the pigsty of this world and they are filthy, but we need to be very careful to treat them as the Father in the story did...and not the elder brother. It takes a lot of courage to make that walk home...but if we leave the light on, they will find their way home eventually. Very few people stay in the pigsty of life forever...I mean, we have our fun for a time, but who wants to live there when you have a whole Kingdom awaiting you? It reminds me of the old Motel 6 commerical with Tom Bodette "We'll Leave the Light On for Ya". Sometimes in the darkness of night, the prodigals of this world need to see that little beacon of light to grab on to and find their way back home to the peace that can only be found in our God. Just remember when they show up on the door step, to be the Father, and not the brother!
I don't know about you, but my light literally and figuratively is on, every night...
JOY
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
If You Don't Stand for Something...
Well, it's been a crazy week and I hope everyone had a great 4th of July as I did in Boerne with my family! I of course have to put in a shameless pic or two of the twins 1st birthday before I get down to business...how cute are they??? Happy 1st Birthday Madison & Mason!
So, as I was in Boerne this past weekend and after the big hoopla party on Saturday, Sunday, we went to FBC Boerne where Holly and Shannon attend church (and when I say "we", I mean the WHOLE family, both sides...we took up an entire long pew!) and at the end of the service, the kiddos were presented before the church for a baby dedication. We, as a family, all stood up front with them (after shameless-ley taking a bunch of pics) and along with the pastor and church congregation, prayed over their family and dedicated that EACH of us would dedicate ourselves to praying for them and participate in guiding them in a Godly way. It was a very sweet, and important time, as we all made a promise before God to do whatever it takes personally to grow them into mighty warriors for the Kingdom!
For the two days since, I just can't stop thinking about that, but how it relates to the marriage ceremony. Although we didn't take a convenant on Sunday at the baby dedication, each one of us took it very seriously. Similarly, the marriage ceremony is when two people make a covenant, the strongest promise we can make here on Earth mind you, to God that no matter what, we will be there for each other and that what God joins together, let no man separate...right?! And as bridesmaids, groomsmen and attenders of the wedding, aren't we all there as witnesses dedicating ourselves to pray for that couple, support them, be there when the chips are down, encourage them through the valleys and mountain top experiences? Then, answer me this...why is it so accepted when people throw in the towel and get divorced? I will let you think on this for a moment...
(**cue the crickets chirping, dead silence and loud gulp by everyone reading this**)
Due to my experience, a lot of women open up to me now about their marital problems (and as one dear friend so eloquently put it, I wasn't approachable before because everyone thought I had it all together...wow, how sad is that as I was missing the boat with people I cared about the most and didn't even know it). I am so humbled and honestly, I feel like the LAST person on Earth that should be offering advice but all I can do is tell others what God has done to me and through me during this period and hope that HIS light shines through and HIS message is heard...not mine. Many of the people I talk to at some point in the conversation tell me that someone else is encouraging them to leave the marriage. Wow...talk about a back seat driver.
But I will tell you this, I am extremely sensitive to how this world portrays divorce. It honestly is a laughable matter to many and that just sets my teeth on edge to be quite frank. Even people who have BEEN THROUGH IT, just laugh it off...well we all knew that one wouldn't work out! It just makes me sick...we, as the world, have bought in to the lie and accepted that 52% of marriages bust up and "that's okay". Or the ones that truly drive me nuts are the people that encourage others to leave their marriage and convince them that divorce is the easy road...there would have to be some SERIOUS reasons for me to ever encourage someone to leave their marriage (and there are those reasons for sure so don't get me wrong...but that's not for today's topic!). Move on...get a new husband/wife that gets you...all your problems will be fixed now...YOU DESERVE IT/BETTER...you're young and got so much life to live...next time around will be better...do I need to tell you more or do you get the point? Folks, those are lies...do you know that 70%+ of second marriages fail?! And 80% of 3rd marriages, etc...you get the point. Now, I do have to throw in a disclaimer that I do know people that have married a second time and God has blessed their union and they are truly happy but that is because they learned the lessons from the first time and didn't repeat the same mistakes they did the first time around. But, not one of those people can say that there wasn't a LOT of pain through their divorce and I bet not one of them would laugh off their divorce or anyone elses nor would they wish that pain on their worst enemy.
I hope I didn't offend anyone by what I wrote today as that is not my intention...but I wanted to make the point that if you don't stand for something...you will fall for everything. If every one of us would take a stand on the side of marriage for our friends, our family and dedicate ourselves to praying for one another, being real with one another, encouraging one another and not accepting divorce as an easy out...don't you think we might change the perception around marriage and maybe, just maybe the statistics of failed marriages would drop? And at the very least, quit blowing off the importance of the covenant? If every person stopped using divorce as a threat in an argument, or saying "my next husband...", or just stopped laughing everytime someone said so and so got divorced and saying "big suprise"...basically made divorce "un-cool"...what would happen?
It's just a thought and I will leave that one hanging...but just thinking that we all need to revamp how we look at the union of marriage.
Standing on the side of marriage,
JOY
So, as I was in Boerne this past weekend and after the big hoopla party on Saturday, Sunday, we went to FBC Boerne where Holly and Shannon attend church (and when I say "we", I mean the WHOLE family, both sides...we took up an entire long pew!) and at the end of the service, the kiddos were presented before the church for a baby dedication. We, as a family, all stood up front with them (after shameless-ley taking a bunch of pics) and along with the pastor and church congregation, prayed over their family and dedicated that EACH of us would dedicate ourselves to praying for them and participate in guiding them in a Godly way. It was a very sweet, and important time, as we all made a promise before God to do whatever it takes personally to grow them into mighty warriors for the Kingdom!
For the two days since, I just can't stop thinking about that, but how it relates to the marriage ceremony. Although we didn't take a convenant on Sunday at the baby dedication, each one of us took it very seriously. Similarly, the marriage ceremony is when two people make a covenant, the strongest promise we can make here on Earth mind you, to God that no matter what, we will be there for each other and that what God joins together, let no man separate...right?! And as bridesmaids, groomsmen and attenders of the wedding, aren't we all there as witnesses dedicating ourselves to pray for that couple, support them, be there when the chips are down, encourage them through the valleys and mountain top experiences? Then, answer me this...why is it so accepted when people throw in the towel and get divorced? I will let you think on this for a moment...
(**cue the crickets chirping, dead silence and loud gulp by everyone reading this**)
Due to my experience, a lot of women open up to me now about their marital problems (and as one dear friend so eloquently put it, I wasn't approachable before because everyone thought I had it all together...wow, how sad is that as I was missing the boat with people I cared about the most and didn't even know it). I am so humbled and honestly, I feel like the LAST person on Earth that should be offering advice but all I can do is tell others what God has done to me and through me during this period and hope that HIS light shines through and HIS message is heard...not mine. Many of the people I talk to at some point in the conversation tell me that someone else is encouraging them to leave the marriage. Wow...talk about a back seat driver.
But I will tell you this, I am extremely sensitive to how this world portrays divorce. It honestly is a laughable matter to many and that just sets my teeth on edge to be quite frank. Even people who have BEEN THROUGH IT, just laugh it off...well we all knew that one wouldn't work out! It just makes me sick...we, as the world, have bought in to the lie and accepted that 52% of marriages bust up and "that's okay". Or the ones that truly drive me nuts are the people that encourage others to leave their marriage and convince them that divorce is the easy road...there would have to be some SERIOUS reasons for me to ever encourage someone to leave their marriage (and there are those reasons for sure so don't get me wrong...but that's not for today's topic!). Move on...get a new husband/wife that gets you...all your problems will be fixed now...YOU DESERVE IT/BETTER...you're young and got so much life to live...next time around will be better...do I need to tell you more or do you get the point? Folks, those are lies...do you know that 70%+ of second marriages fail?! And 80% of 3rd marriages, etc...you get the point. Now, I do have to throw in a disclaimer that I do know people that have married a second time and God has blessed their union and they are truly happy but that is because they learned the lessons from the first time and didn't repeat the same mistakes they did the first time around. But, not one of those people can say that there wasn't a LOT of pain through their divorce and I bet not one of them would laugh off their divorce or anyone elses nor would they wish that pain on their worst enemy.
I hope I didn't offend anyone by what I wrote today as that is not my intention...but I wanted to make the point that if you don't stand for something...you will fall for everything. If every one of us would take a stand on the side of marriage for our friends, our family and dedicate ourselves to praying for one another, being real with one another, encouraging one another and not accepting divorce as an easy out...don't you think we might change the perception around marriage and maybe, just maybe the statistics of failed marriages would drop? And at the very least, quit blowing off the importance of the covenant? If every person stopped using divorce as a threat in an argument, or saying "my next husband...", or just stopped laughing everytime someone said so and so got divorced and saying "big suprise"...basically made divorce "un-cool"...what would happen?
It's just a thought and I will leave that one hanging...but just thinking that we all need to revamp how we look at the union of marriage.
Standing on the side of marriage,
JOY
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