With this ring...

Eight years ago, at 3pm on a beautiful Saturday in Tyler, TX at the Rose Gardens, I said "I Do" to the man of my dreams.  It still is the best day of my life, even now.  Last year on our 7 year anniversary, we had an amazing day in Rome, fabulous Italian dinner, strolled around the Vatican area at night...just a dream.  And now, one short year later, I hold a piece of paper that says that marriage is no more.  Talk about a nightmare...very surreal in thinking how did we get here?  I refuse to be sad on this day...instead, I think about all the wonderful memories we had together and I just keep praying God's will be done.

I get a lot of strange looks and close friends have bluntly asked, "why are you still wearing your wedding ring?"  It is a complicated and loaded question...those that aren't married or have never been divorced probably can't understand it.  There are several reasons that I will share here and try to explain...

1.  For me, it takes more than a piece of paper to say this marriage is over.  I took a vow, I believe in that vow, even if the other person does not.  You don't erase an 8 year marriage with a piece of paper...sorry State of Texas but you don't.
2.  It is a reminder of the convenant I took before God when I was married AND right now, it is also a big reminder of the promise I have from God that He has a plan, it's a perfect plan, and I just need to wait on Him and not be distracted by the noise of this world.
3.  It is a barrier for people to leave me alone---I'm not interested in dating, meeting other people, etc.  Thanks, but no thanks.  And I don't want to be asked (and yes, that has already happened).  I also don't feel it is necessary to have conversations with every person I meet on the fact that I'm divorced/single and why.  None-ya bizness!
4.  It is a signal to others that God has not released me from my vows at this point.  Believe me, I have asked.  But right now, He says wait.  Do not take the ring off.  There is a reason.

With all the above being said, there may come a day when I'm released from the above and the ring does come off and I'm free to move on.  I'm not in denial of what is going on around me.  I'm not delusional...but it's complicated.  I have zero clue as to what the future holds, so I'm just trying my best to be obedient, keep the faith and wait on God's perfect timing...not mine.  And a major lesson I've learned in all of this is that God's plan and timing is NOTHING like mine...it's better.

Here's to Eight Years...

JOY